Battlefleet Gothic: The Point of Ork Kroozers

So, I had this idea to write a series of tactical analysis articles about a dead game I've hardly played, and am not likely to play for the foreseeable future. Why? Well, its something to do. I'm building some Ork Ships, so why not use the creative energy that's there?

I must have rewrote this one 3 or 4 times, as it topic you kind of have to address to you want to armchair-admiral some orks, but I was struggling for an angle. Capital ships are the bread and butter of Battlefleet Gothic, with your average fleet built around them. With Orkish Kroozers its a bit different. While there is some variation, Orks usually have a limitation on how many capitals they can field, often 6, with larger ships unlocking based on the number of the basic Kroozers. In practice, its not something you necessarily struggle against, but you will find that Ork Fleets tend towards Escorts, if only because Kroozers don't have the same immediate appeal. In fact, a well-known fleet build back in the day was to field 2 Terror Ships with Warlords on them, and then every single Ramship you could afford. I know this because that's how my fleet started, but by more modern standards its kinda reductionist. Later ships like the Hammer shifted the balance of power, while later rulesets did stuff to expand/modify the Warlord Upgrades you can give them. Overall, Kroozers have thick armour and lots of gun upfront, less on the side, and a weak back end vulnerable to Bomber tokens. There's some similarity to Imperial ships in overall characteristics, loosing a shield and turret in exchange for 10 hull points. Both the Kill Kroozer and Terrorship are relatively inexpensive for capital ships, but are characterised by both short-ranged/randomised weaponry and mediocre leadership. As all that makes them unwieldy & inconsistent when not going in a straight line, you may ask what the point is?

I'm gonna flip the format a little, and just tell you the point upfront: Kroozers are good at Ramming and Boarding. This is why I called them Battlewagons, what gunz they have are for supporting fire, before their passengers jump out and axe something, or you commit an act of vehicular murder. A Kill Kroozer aims to do this exclusively, while a Terror Ship holds off a bit to launch attack craft, before doing the same. If you aren't trying to have them reach out and touch the enemy, and you aren't dealing with something like holofields or an obviously suicidal match up, you are doing it wrong. Seriously, put a Warlord on it if you can, and then get in something's face. A case can be made for using them in paired Squadrons, as this maximises their dakka and minimises leadership problems, but you loose flexibility. But basically, you want to have in these situations where the high number of hull points are an asset and Ork faction bonuses are used. You have modifiers for boarding actions, and can go All Ahead Full automatically, use these abilities. We will now go through the lesser functions of a Kroozer, and in the process talk about the common Ork weaponry.

 

Secondary function: Gunz Batteries

On a Kroozer, Gunz batteries fluctuate between good and mundane given facing or dice roll, but otherwise function as generic weapon batteries. On the prow, these have 45cm range and average about strength 6, which is useful given how Ork ships like to charge at things. On the flanks, these perform like a solo Onslaught, but this ends up something quite forgettable by cruiser standards. Reliability can be increased via Maniak Gunners, bringing up the average by 1 point of FP, which can be worth the cost against some foes. That said, randomness can be just as frustrating to a foe as it is you, as BFG is often a game of careful planning and risk management. The above means that these weapons offer only modest covering fire at a distance, but have synergy with Heavy Gunz. One factor however easily overlooked however is that these weapons do not have overlapping arcs, so to fire at full effectiveness, you have to be surrounded by targets. I.e after a ram.

Secondary Function: Heavy Gunz

I find Heavy Gunz to be in an odd place, tactically speaking. It's not that they are actually bad, because if ya Kroozer is doing its job right, it's gonna make good use of them. It's just that if an option is present to swap them out, it's more gonna be immediately useful. There is something to be said here for the Kill Kroozer and its broadsides. If it gets into an enemy formation, it won't struggle to find good targets with its HGs but there's quirks. While Heavy Gunz function much like Gunz batteries, and weapon batteries too, but is not as simple as just doubling damage. Heavy Gunz operate only within 15cm, and without the left shift, meaning they don't fire often, and don't gain as much as you may think. It's also very easy to make the mistake of equating these to Lances, given their position in the armoury. No, these are far more general in application, and while they technically usable against 6+ due to the doubling, they work better versus escorts and Panzees than Lances do. Also, people forget that these are the rare ork weapon without random strength. 

 

Secondary Function: Launch Bays

I've already written at length about the Orky bomber issue, but to summarise: you do need Attack Craft to compensate for Ork weaknesses there. This makes the Terror Ship more immediately valuable than the Kill Kroozer, as while you pay more, you do swap the sometimes Heavy Gunz for the always Launch Bays. However, an issue here is that is you have to devote time to Reload orders, which can be a complication even if you pass. A Terror Ship has to do two jobs, but a Kill Kroozer has just one.

Secondary Function: Torpedoes

A huge part of Humie Fleet tactics, torpedoes are a rabbithole of a topic. At a basic level, their ability to ignore Shields and then just keep on going to hit the ship behind as well is a big thing. Entire fleets can be given second thoughts by a well-placed volley. Kroozer tubes have the same randomness as Gunz Batteries but have the rather useful option for Boarding Torpedoes. These are great for minimising enemy fire by breaking stuff. Opting for torpedoes over heavy Gunz then is very easy to justify, if only for the fact they can effect the game far sooner. But some foes are going to be much more resistant to this than others.

A Word On Warlord Upgrades

In the absence of bigger ships, Kroozers inevitably become the personal ships of Warlords, whom unlike other factions other a variety of performance improvements, and rerolls, but never improved Leadership. The main selling point here is the significant buff to Boarding Actions, and frequently, you see people going straight for the extra Shield, and maybe a few rerolls. If you are using the Clans list that I keep bloody mentioning though, you've got more interesting options available. There's several of direct application to boarding, ramming and so on, but plonking Looted Lances on a Kill Kroozer is appealing.

Wrapping things up

Kroozers are perhaps the least interesting aspect of the assorted Ork fleets, but are an important part of things. They take the hits your escorts cannot, and hit harder under specific circumstances. Like I said before, think of them as Battlewagons, ork delivery systems, and distractions.

Mini-Review: Into the Breach (PC 2018)

 

 

This game is inherently depressing. You're playing a team of time travellers trying to undo an alien bug invasion. You go back, and try to retcon events, but you must do so perfectly. Inevitably, you make a mistake, and it snowballs into human extinction. So you try again, in a different timeline. The reality you find yourself in is similar but different. Geography has changed, the procedurally generated scenarios have rolled up something new. You don't get to relive that moment, that mistake that killed everyone remains. You will, at best, save a bunch of people uncannily similar to those you lost. More likely, you will fail again, damning another iteration of humanity to extinction. There is no hope, only the terrible certainty of each and every action. A deterministic hell, where being technically able to save scum history just sees you reliving failure after failure.

Fuck me.

Now, you may think I'm being dramatic, but that's story that ITB tells. Gameplay mechanics and battle chatter hammer this home, and by the second day of ownership the tone of the game was unavoidable. This wasn't a good thing for me, as I'll admit to it being 2020 when I wrote this, but it is it what is. What is it otherwise? Well, it's made by the people whom did FTL: Faster Than Light, a highly regarded rogue-lite and Kickstarter success story. ITB inherits similar themes and gameplay features, although it's more of a turn based strategy game. You have three dudes in high tech warmachines, one of which is likely a giant robot, and you Pacific Rim your way through the game. The main gameplay innovation is that it provides concise information on basically everything that happens in an easily grasped visual manner. You always know what the bugs are, what they are going to attack, and what the consequences will be, with the same for your own actions. This makes the game more like a puzzler than a wargame, because everything is known to you, and outcomes are resolutely predictable. While initially fascinated by this, I eventually found this to be restrictive, and the game in general to be repetitive. 

 

ITB offers a lot of robot punching, but it does not offer variety in that punching. A mission will often feel like there is either only one solution, or you've made a mistake that will cripple you in future missions. I find it misleading to call this a strategy game as you don't strategise as such. It's more crisis management, or tower defence. Experimentation almost feels discouraged for the same reason, while the mechanics introduced in later levels don't add much variety. All this aggravates my perfectionist tendencies while not allowing me creativity in my solutions, which I'm not a fan of. And I have some nasty suspicions about the ending, should I reach it...

 

Into The Breach is a well-made, innovative game. Unfortunately, after a good first impression, I don't like it.

Remembering: Outlaw Star

This is not a review. Well, it is kind of. When I write this style of post it's usually to praise something in the context of my own experiences. I picked up the boxset of this because something triggered nostalgia for it, and because I needed some low expectation comfort telly to offset hell year 2020. On that level, Outlaw Star succeeds, but it's not a genre classic like some of the other animes I've spoken of.

Outlaw Star is roughly what you would get if you wanted to do Star Wars, but with more Han Solo and pirates. Its aiming for similar space opera territory, with aliens, magic, and unique expository narration at the start of each episode. It's action-packed, often comedic, and TBH a bit more invested in the ladies than Star Wars. A character defining moment for Gene Starwind, the lead, is when he frequents a brothel in episode 1. The series sees him and his motley crew claim a spaceship from some rather nasty pirates, and go on adventures. The opening sequence is excellent, with the credit sequences favouring some interesting static fantasy art. And, it's a second tier show. Let's put it like this: Outlaw Star is a 6 outta 10 with a good mix of ideas. Sometimes it's a good 7, others it's a 5, but it's usually zipping along at a good pace. The problem is usually not that it's actually bad, the problem that it's ultimately shallow, unfocused, and kinda disposable. There's so many good ideas here, but some conflict, or just get lost in the shuffle. And on the rewatch it's easy how the fading of memory and youthful inexperience made it look better than it was. I mean, by far the most memorable part of this anime is the whole punchy starship thing, and you are waiting until episode 8 before the series properly demonstrated the idea. Why aren't you doing this absolutely all the time? Oh right, its because you want to do another episode about how they can't afford the ship's running costs. A wasted opportunity, I feel. Also, I admit that I was rather fond of Aisha Clan Clan, haughty alien catgirl, as episode 5 was the first I ever saw. I'm still vaguely disappointed she wasn't in the show more. 

 

What-could-have-beens aside, Outlaw Star's main issue is probably pacing and uneven characterisation. Things move at a brisk pace at first, but things slow down and become episodic fluff towards the middle. The main plot gets put in a holding pattern, as the series busies itself with detours and subplots, before gearing things up for the finale. Again, this is not necessarily bad, but this is the of situation where I feel the time could have been better used. Gene is rounded, but characters like Twilight Suzuka and Jim Hawking never get fleshed out really. If it wasn't for the narrator we'd know sod all about 'em too, and I believe in show, not tell. Female lead Melfina doesn't do that much better, as she's explicitly a blank slate at first, but at least she has plot to do. And, thinking of it on rewatch, the series kills someone whom is arguably its best character in episode 4. It's happy to ogle the ladies though, and while it's use of fanservice is less obnoxious than say Gurren Lagann, it's not gonna be winning any awards for progressive characterisation. Especially in relation to that one episode with Fred Lowe and his notably muscular fiancé.

 

 

Overall, Outlaw Star may have been better served with a 13 episode OVA format. This thought came to me just as I counted the number of episodes reasonably called filler, found it was a third, and decided to cease my rewatch.

I feel I am possibly being too harsh. Is it still worth watching? Well, yeah, if only the once. Outlaw Star starts really strong and fast-paced, as the world is built and the titular ship is found. Once that's done, we get to meet the two final regulars, before things go episodic. Like I said, there's nothing necessarily wrong with episodic shows, and some one-off stories are great, but your mileage may vary. Strong opening arc, then it waffles a bit. But, like I said, comfort telly. 

 

 

Gunpla: The JDG-009X Death Army (HGFC)

By 1994, following an economic downturn and the by-all-accounts depressing Victory Gundam, Bandai had decided to take things in a new direction. This was "what if Gundam were also Dragonball", resulting in Mobile Fighter G Gundam. To say that this was a radical departure would be an understatement, as all pretence of realism was swapped for martial arts tropes and some quite cringe-inducing national stereotypes. Bandai never tried that again, and this remains a rare Gundam spin-off that's alien to me. Mind you it seems to consist only of memes, WTF, and industrial amounts of hammy dialogue, so I'm curious.

The Death Army, or Dark Army to Americans, long story, is in truth a fairly mundane pleb by the standards of the show. Its a mass-produced suit that exists for a multinational team of Gundams to beat up. There's a couple of odd features to note, like the ability to fold up for combination stuff, which I skipped, and it's distinctive beam rifle/club. Yes, let's take an energy weapon and bludgeon people with it. Its also a machine built by the aptly named Devil Gundam, piloted by corpses resurrected by the Devil's nanotech. Its both the Zombie Apocalypse and the Grey Goo scenario in one. Yes, that counts as mundane for G Gundam. If you disagree, go look up the Nether Gundam or the Walter Gundam.

As a project, the Death Army is firmly in armybuilder territory, a simple kit that Bandai would like it if you brought multiples of, and therefore is streamlined. The build is very much akin with the 30MM line, and the similarly mookish Leo, although not as elegant. An Alto for example keeps the number of sprues down, keeps seamlines to a minimum, and is completely indifferent to colour accuracy issues by its very nature. The DA meanwhile has some sprue doubling, suffers with some nasty seams around the spiky bits, and skips some brown segments easily covered by a sticker. Which is weird, as we do get some great stickers for its rotating monoeye gimmick. Posability meanwhile is decent, although I feel the elbows could have been better, and its more suited to bludgeoning poses than shooty ones. Quite acceptable, mind you.

To go on a tangent for a moment, like the Galbaldy, this kit is very obviously intended for a double-dip in the Build sub-franchise, where you can find a less spiky and more purple quadruped version of it. I can't comment on the quality of that one, but I'm inclined to think that this zombie came out better than the Galbaldy did for its price. Yes, there's elements that I can't be bothered to correct, but this is fellow is explicitly for building in bulk. There's nothing about it that seems needlessly over-complicated.

Overall? Perfectly good for what it is, more satisfying than some, but not exceptional.

The Mecha Hack: How to handle Macross?

The Macross franchise is a fairly influential mecha series known for its transforming jet robots and weaponised idol singers. In the West, its known more as the good bit of Robotech, but let's not get too far into that mess. I don't feel the need to rant about the famously litigious Harmony Gold just now. Here's a video clip.

 

Now, let's say you wanted to run a RPG of that. You can quite reasonably use any of the transformation based modules in The Mecha Hack ruleset, but the thing is, Macross tends towards aircraft-based realism. In fighter mode, a Valkyrie moves at supersonic speeds, with the battlefield being a rolling road across continents. In gerwalk mode, you've got what amounts to an attack helicopter with arms, but still trucking along at three hundred miles a hour plus. Finally, the Battroid form doesn't really fly too much, but it can still run faster than is legal on a motorway. There is a fundamental disconnect between the scale of each mode, which may operate very differently in space or in an atmosphere, AND pilots can switch mode to get a tactical advantage. So, how would you attempt to depict that, without falling into a pit of complexity completely at odds with a “Hack” game? This is what I came up with.

 

The Core Concept of a Variable Fighter 

In a battle scene, the Gamesmaster will describe the battlefield and which of the three modes would be “dominant”in it. A mecha would gain the benefits of that mode, rather than having to declare and manage their own transformations.


Fighter Mode : Supersonic

In this form, a mecha can make two moves as a single action. Also, if you roll a 20 when attacking with Missile Weapons, you may reroll it.


Gerwalk Mode: Multi-vectored thrust

In this form, when taking Mobility tests to avoid attacks and dangerous terrain effects, if you roll a 20, you may reroll it.


Battroid Mode: Defensive fire

In this form, a mecha has Advantage to defend against Missile Weapons. It also gains 3 points of temporary armour, which replenishes at the next rest.


Transforming in Combat

While a given combat will feature a dominant mode, players can opt to change form temporarily to again the benefits of that mode. As a Use action, a player may opt to change into a different mode, gaining all the appropriate rules from that moment, replacing what they had before, until they act in the next Moment. Alternatively, a player may opt for an Emergency Transformation, assuming they are not currently prevented from taking actions, I. E overheat. This is an exception to the normal limits on actions, and the player must immediately take a Systems check. If successful, their mecha changes form as above. If they failed, their mecha does not change, and as suffers Disadvantage on the next dice they roll, commonly the attack they were trying to avoid.



A word on THE NEED FOR SPEED and splitting the party

As mentioned, while all modes can fly to some extent, there is a marked difference between them with respects to their speed. The above rules assume the players are trying to function as a Squadron, and keeping pace with each-other, but this may not the be case. If a player chooses to be the odd one out and stick with a form that either outstrips or falls behind the other players, this will split the party and the GM will have to compensate, I.e. slowpoke skips a Moment.


Missile Weapons 

Due to their aircraft roots, most mecha in Macross have access to guided missiles, often in huge amounts. There's a trope about it. This can be in conflict with more conventional aspects of the show, as to be a mecha is to be humanised, but missiles kill you from yonks away with a button press. So, we want missiles to be dramatic, but not overpowering. With this in mind, missiles should have a restriction on their use, i.e. a Reactor Roll or treated as consumable items. I have also made them work off the System stat below, as I feel it adds a bit of nuance and represents the automated nature of guided missiles quite well.


Dogfighting, Hostile Mecha, and Battlefield Effects 

It is generally assumed that Variable Fighters can only be targeted by ranged attacks made by other similarly airborne mecha or dedicated anti-aircraft weapons. Also, there's a tendency for Valkyries to have a significant numerical disadvantage, versus factions like the Zentradi. As such, the attacks made by other things like spaceships, Destroids playing defence, vast Regult mobs, and land-based vehicles are probably best represented by either the swarm rules(1), or battlefield effects with names like "Flak Curtain" or "Bullets in Every Direction".


A Sample Class

I'm not trying to do a total conversion here, more an intellectual exercise. If you want to have some of the more out-there aspects of Macross, you'll have to do this yourself. I chose the VF-11B due to its relative simplicity and archetypical features. Its based loosely on the Scout class, as I feel d8s and d10s are probably better used on heavier or more elite aircraft. This could be adapted easily into mainstay fighters like the VF-1 and VF-171, or more conventional “heroes” like the VF-19 or VF-25. If you find it simple, remember that this is a minimalist game system, and players get a lot more options due to the transformation. You don't have to model all the things, just the bits that are flavourful, and this ends up being four times more complex than any class in the rulebook anyway. For context: here is a video of the VF-11B in action, where it largely used up its lifetime supply of awesome, and yes, the voice is Bryan Cranston.

The Shinsei Industry VF-11B Super Thunderbolt Class
Hit Die d6 Damage Die d6 Reactor Die d6

Starting HP

1d6 + 6

Weapons and Armour

All handheld weapons, shields, FAST Packs, and the Protect Armor System.

Levelling Up

Roll your hit die to gain new hit points. Roll to see if attributes increase, rolling twice for Mobility and System. At level 3, gain access to the Protect Armor System in special missions. At level 5, submit your Application for a better plane...

Starting Equipment

30mm Gunpod with Bayonet (Light Ranged Weapon), Shield (2AP, Battliod/Gerwalk only), FAST Pack Missile Bays, Comlink.

Design Features & Weapons

FAST Pack Missile Bays- As an attack action, test System. If you succeed, deal 4d4 damage, divided as you choose between enemies at Near/Far range. Then roll your Reactor Die.

Protect Armor System

Damage Die and Reactor Die both become d8, but the variable fighter remains locked in battroid form, and has Disadvantage on Mobility Tests. It replaces its usual equipment with “Protect Armour (10AP), large reactive armor shield (5AP), GU-XS-06 Long-Range High-Piercing-Round Gun Pod (heavy ranged weapon), FAST pack Missile Bays, Heavy Missile Pod, Comlink”. The equipment can be purged with a Use Action, reverting the variable fighter to its normal state, i.e d6 Reactor Die, other equipment at GM discretion.

Heavy Missile Pod - As an attack action, test System. If you succeed, deal 3D8 damage to a single Near/Far target. Then roll Your Reactor Die.

And finally: Macross isn't about killing people

Yes, I know, 1200 odd words so far purely about effectively modelling aircraft-based robo-warfare. But we now need to address tone. Individual instalments differ in focus, but Macross largely does not do nihilism or War is Hell, and if anything has themes of finding common ground over shared culture. Music is always there, a usually positive force balancing out the destructive ones. This is an area where Presence Tests and actual roleplaying is needed, so keep this in mind when running such a game. Also, Macross was originally planned as a comedy, so by all means, be goofy.

Footnote

1) Which are still unpublished at time of writing. Come on, Mission Manual.

Battlefleet Gothic: Why Orks HATE Bomber Tokens

So, I had this idea to write a series of tactical analysis articles about a dead game I've hardly played, and am not likely to play for the foreseeable future. Why? Well, its something to do. I'm building some Ork Ships, so why not use the creative energy that's there?

The Context

So, when I started working on these articles, I had a more traditional approach in mind. I'd start with a grand summary of how the Ork fleets work, and then break it down, ship-by-ship over a series of posts. I decided against this because I'm just not an authority on any of this, and I'm not in a position to playtest. So, I go for talking points and light entertainment instead. One subject that wouldn't go away during drafting though was the matter of bombers. Something Ork fleets struggle with, both in defence and offence. What follows is a discussion of the matter, where the dread implement known as a calculator was used.

Bombers v The Lunar class, or Average McBaseline

Let us run through how a typical wave of 4 bomber tokens might interact with your typical humie Lunar Class cruiser. Bombers generate 1d6 attacks per token, minus the turret value of 2. This gives a spread of 0 to 4 attacks, and an average of 1.66666 - it goes on. We then assume that the cruiser can both respond and does so without flair, killing the average single token, leaving three to break stuff. This means the surviving bombers generate between 0 and 12 attacks, averaging 5, and remember we only need 8 hits to total the ship. We then apply armour value by dividing by 3, and ignore the matter of critical hits just now. What all this boils down to is that 4 Bombers could reasonably expect to inflict 1.66666667 damage on the Lunar. Isn't math fun? The thing you should take away though is that most weapons in BFG are rigidly predictable, and Bomber tokens aren't that. There is a wide swing between the minimum, average, and maximum, ignoring shields and positioning of the target. And, importantly, your turrets have to choose between destroying torpedoes and attack craft, so these numbers can go up higher.

How it looks for Orks

Ork Kroozers have one less turret and a 4+ rear facing, and this snowballs. A single bomber token averages here at 2.5 attacks with 1.25 damage, and maximum of 5. If we make the favourable assumption only 3 tokens connect as with the scenario above, this equates to 3.75 damage, more than double what the Lunar might expect, with the maximum being 15. This is the main reason why Orks hate Bombers, even under a modestly favourable scenario, its gonna hurt. Its hard to argue an upside here, except that the thick fronts of Ork craft usually mean torpedoes are ignorable, and while the escorts die fast to Bombers, its not worse than escorts usually do. 

 

How do Ork Fighta-Bommas work?

In a jack of all trades kinda way. These move a little slower than Fighters, and their bombload is only D3. Later rulesets modify this in line with the “Turret Suppression” concept, which gives them a minimum output of 1 attack per token. The math for this is simple, anyway, assuming that the target has at least 2 turrets. Count up the number of tokens hitting a ship, deduct turrets, and then divide by armour, and you get your number. In the Lunar example above, again assuming average performance, 4 fighta-bommas would suffer one loss, inflict 1 damage, the maximum being 3. Meanwhile, Ork kroozers tend to have middling leadership so reloading the bays is often an issue. This would be reason 2 why Orks hate bombers, ours aren't brilliant. Now, the above means a Fighta-Bomba is unlikely to damage a capital ship that isn't already crippled, has only mediocre success against escorts, and you may not get to launch more. However, two things are easily overlooked. The first is that they always do at least one attack if they survive, and the second is that you aren't forced to choose between fighters and Bombers like other Factions are. This means that you can be opportunistic and adaptable, where others cannot. Also, Fighta-bommas are entirely functional in a Combat Air Patrol role.

Assault Boats, AKA Reason 3

Competing for launch space are Assault Boats, which are rulebook standard with no quirks. As such, these token move faster than your Fighta-Bommas, and reliably inflict annoying critical damage 5/6 of the time on cruisers, and fatal damage on escorts with the same ratio. This means that Assault Boats end up doing the anti-ship role more normally applied to bombers, and by extension demoting Fighta-Bommas to slow fighters with an ability people don't like.

Possible Solutions

The good news is that if Bombers are really getting ya down, the Clans list has two ways to increase turrets. Things look better for the larger Ork ships, as these bring more attack craft to the table, while lacking the 4+ butt, and frequently have 3 or more turrets. Its at this point where individual Bomber tokens start to have an even chance of doing either nothing or very little, so your opponent tries putting in a few Fighters for the purpose of Turret Suppression. How that can effect outcomes is tedious to work out, but it places a minimum number of attacks equal to the turret value of the victim. In such a situation, averages go up while maximums go down, assuming they don't just bludgeon a ship to death with a wing of 8 tokens. However, the most interesting solution to the Bomber issue I've come across is to simply feed them an escort. Bombers are tokens, not ships, which means their reactions are preset and MUST attack a ship when they contact one. Sending a Brute to its doom may well be worth it.

Wrapping Things Up

Orky issues with Bombers is something you just have the deal with. A weakness to be acknowledged, but not feared. There's ways around it, and if someone decided to go bomber heavy? Well, they are just gonna have less actual guns.

Remembering: Samurai Jack

 

 

Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku, the shape-shifting Master of Darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil!

But a foolish samurai warrior wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose me.

Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time, and flung him into the future, where my evil is law!

Now the fool seeks to return to the past, and undo the future that is Aku!

Created by Cartoon Network big man Genndy Tartakovsky, Samurai Jack is likely the simplest cartoon you will ever watch. One that often has more dialogue in its explanatory intro, than the rest of the show. A narrative where the lead character's actual name is unknown to us, and the antagonists name, Aku, literally means evil. An animation that sought to replicate martial arts films as children's TV, and so moved things into a generic future when robots could be shredded without fear of setting off the censors. Its mainly action, but it can be quite daft too, with the Samurai's initial encounters including talking dogs, the Ant Hill Mob, and possibly the most powerful Scottish stereotype ever created. It's all done in a minimalist style of simple shapes and hard angles. However, to quote someone out of context, simple isn't the same as stupid. As animation, Samurai Jack is possibly the most beautiful thing ever made for American TV. And if you picked your episode, it's a match for any live action set-piece. Look at the Spartans episode, the one with the shinobi, the zombies in the graveyard, the gladiators, the giant robot fight, Lulu, sweet thing, and anything involving the Scotsman. Its all good, or at least distinctively interesting.

 

And so "Jack" strides this weird future, facing countless bounty hunters, demons, lost temples, and prolonged homages to action cinema. You never quite know what you are going to get. Mind you, the show does have does have a structural flaw, one that's unavoidable due to its concept and magnified by its episodic format. If Jack finds a time portal, the series ends immediately and as it's two recurring characters are absolute paragons of good or evil, there's little way to develop them further. The joy of things is that you can drop the samurai into any scenario and watch the fireworks, but this is still a status quo throughout 52 episodes. So, as things went on, episodes got more experimental, with Jack having a minor role in several as different viewpoints get explored. It's perhaps telling that award-winning "Birth of Evil" two parter features Jack only as a newborn. The show ended on a somewhat goofy episode where Jack cares for a baby, and for 13 years that was it. There were comics, but no conclusion. Then Genndy T cut a deal to make a fifth season to finish it, under the less restrictive Adult Swim banner.

As I had never seen this season, that was where I started with my bluray boxset. It was startling how much it was like I remembered the show, but also not. Its still as action packed, but now there's an actual plot. The goofier stuff is initially absent, replaced by existential despair. Aku has destroyed every time portal off-screen and decided to wait for Jack to die of old age. This surprisingly pragmatic act by the hugely hammy and stereotypically villainous Aku has however backfired: the samurai does not age, seemingly due to time travel shenanigans, and is only getting better. Fifty years have past, in total stalemate, and it's broken both of them. “Jack” actually has to talked down from a suicide attempt at one point, with most of the series being about him trying to get level again, and find his lost sword. Its very much a deconstruction of the series so far, not least because he is forced into taking actual human life. But it doesn't stay there. The series ends in a manner that is bittersweet, "Jack" having suffered no small amount of personal loss in victory, but it shows us the lives he saved, and those whom rushed to help him. It wasn't all for nothing, and this grows into a romantic subplot. Its a true deconstruction, as an actual example of the GRIMDARK season 5 looks like, would not allow that. And while I do not wish to discuss the ending in great detail, I will say it handles some bad clichés well.

 

 

Ultimately, Samurai Jack is very simple. So simple that I can't stretch this far past a single page without recounting whole episodes. But like I said, simple isn't the same as stupid. Nor is it the same as being shallow. Its like a poem, but not one that takes itself seriously.

Few things are as singular as Samurai Jack, you just have to watch it.

 

Gunpla: The MSM-03 Gogg (HGUC)

OK, let's talk about a little something I did a while ago, but ended up being pushed back by more immediate topics.....

When the fascistic Zeon forces invaded Earth during the original Gundam series, one problem they had was the absence of a navy. Yes, they had a space navy, but not a navy-navy. One solution to this was, of course, to create giant robots to fight under-water, and this idea is something the franchise tends to revisit. Not to any great extent, but it's not unusual for a few episodes to introduce a few swimming mecha with unusual designs. Today's subject was the first of these, and in some ways a demonstration of how the original Gundam show can tend towards the “super robot” style of things.

 

 

The Gogg is decidedly light on detail and goes for an internal weapon motif. Something that First Gundam popularised was the idea of handheld mecha weapons above all else, but amphibious MS didn't play by that rule, and were also among the least humanoid of the Zeon roster. In many respects, you could call them a throwback to the kind of mecha Gundam was breaking away from, only exceeded by the Mobile Armours in terms of 70's sci-fi styling. However, as simplistic and toyetic as the Gogg looks, and it would not look out of place fighting Mazinger Z, there is a truism or two at play here. The first is that there's nothing wrong with simple if it's done well, and that it's always a joy to have articulated fingers on a robot for cheap laughs.

As a build project, this was a kit of two halves. The legs and body are fairly unremarkable in construction, if fairly good for the time in terms of colours and stickers. There's a lot of (necessarily?) smooth surfaces, and 70's style colouring, so only minor details in obscure places need finishing. Stuff like the inside of the non-standard ankle joint, which I washed but didn't paint, and marker work. I was quite pleased with how the gut area came out; I think I'm getting the hang of paint markers. On the other hand, there are the, well, hands and arms. This is a somewhat more involved, with a load of plastic-on-plastic joints to represent the segmented arms and claws. As this kit is circa 2000, this causes some concern with regards to the joints wearing out, especially as you are expected to detach/reattach segments for "swim mode". As it stands, my example has no immediate cause for concern, but I wouldn't push your luck. The age of the kit means that there's no hole for a stand, which would have been really desirable for something like this, but there is a trio of thrusters in the gooch zone, so I'd imagine it would be an easy mod. 

So, nitpicks aside, what the Gogg ends up being is rolypoly fun. I mean, yes, it will shred you with its iron nails, but it's not intimidating in the conventional sense. All of Zeons original amphibious suits are a bit like that, especially the Acguy, it's probably why they are so memetic. It waddles like an obese man, the leg/body/head/arm design not allowing for dynamic poses, but it will give you the finger. And sometimes, that's enough.

 

 

Gunpla: The UGY-R41 Man Rodi (IBO HG)

The Man Rodi came into Iron-Blooded Orphans just as I lost patience with the anime. Occasionally, I pick up on foreshadowing for tragic events in a story, and immediately drop it. I've no love or patience for the slow-motion car crash, and I prefer actual surprises to telegraphed tragedies. Of course I went back to check while writing this, to see if I was overreacting and took no pleasure in being less pessimistic than the show. And, yes, the dude was piloting one of these. Why did I get this then? Well, the design is interesting and the kit is cheap.

As a build project, the Man Rodi is cathartic but kinda half-arsed. It lacks the internal frame gimmick, which admittedly makes for simpler assembly, but it retains the wasp waist issue a lot of these IBO kits seem to have. As bulky as it looks, you're still relying on a single polycap with only minimal support around it. On the plus side, the colours are on point with minimal stickers, granting you two choices for the unusual eyes, and no comment-worthy paint requirements. Once completed, posability is pretty decent too, considering the bulk, and there is weapon storage. It was lacking something though, like a stand. This is a kit that was crying out for an included flight stand of some kind, as this doesn't actually have feet, and was only seen in space. It can balance by itself, but you aren't getting any dynamic poses without an action base. You get what you pay for, I suppose. Its definitely not bad for what it is, but its not good enough to convince people whom weren't already onboard with its “Froggy-Zaku” styles.

So, with that in mind, and as observant readers will have already realised, I decided to go off plan. The Man Rodi has a classically Zeonic paintjob of two-tone green, but its proportions don't work well with that. There's too much of a contrast between the limbs and its main body. So, spraypaint in grass green! That makes three greens, which helps break things up. I didn't bother with panel-lines, but I may come back to it.

In short: inexpensive kitbash fodder, but not bad.