Generally speaking, I don't bother
with the euphemistically named "third party" Transformer
scene. A better name would be "unlicensed”, such things
trading off the brand recognition while inviting legal action that
never quite seems to happen. I'm not gonna be a snob about such
things, as some of ‘em can be honestly very good, but there is a
certain tendency for these manufacturers to create hugely expensive
boutique items for collectors. Often the same item, by five or so
different companies in rapid succession, that may be short on actual
fun or creativity. So, I only deal with that market very
intermittently, and for oddities. Hence the Tank Alliance and today's
article. The back story of this set is a little mysterious. As near
as I can figure, Yuexing Animation is one of the innumerable Chinese
companies making robot toys, either ripping off Transformers, making
their own stuff, or bootlegging the work of others, and/or being
bootlegged themselves. Specifics seem to be hidden behind the
language barrier, but this does seem to be an attempt to do something
a bit different. And just looking at the stock image should tell you
immediately how different. It's a set of six cutesified WW2 tanks, similar to the World War Toons models by Meng now I come to think of it,
that transform into similarly cute robots, which combine into a giant
robot by way of Funko Pops. Given the general vibe, and similarities
to the Combaticons, this has prompted various half joking nicknames
like "Cuteicus" and “Bruticus, whoops all tanks edition".
It's a frankly daft idea, which I absolutely had to have. Even though
I knew that it was probably going to be a very silly waste of money
even by my standards of self-indulgent purchasing.
So,
what's it like in general? Well, it's like a late wave Combiner Wars
giftset. You know, one that came in a big box, changed up the
accessories, and possibly had a suggestion the moulds are wearing
out? Or, put more charitably, that the design team is doing their
level best, creating an interesting piece, but with a few flaws. It
also comes with a massive box too, which is actually kinda nice, but
don't feel bad about ordering these guys loose. As individual toys
each is fairly reminiscent to a Combiner Wars era limbot deluxe,
notably with respects to the waist joints. It's not direct a copy
though, the combining bits are entirely different, in fact reminding
me a lot of CW Devastator with how the torso goes together. The
inevitable question is build quality, and I'm happy to report a
favourable comparison to a modern Transformers deluxe. It's not as
refined, some things just don’t fit like they probably should, but
I still remember the issues with joint tolerances and tabbing in
Combiner Wars, not to mention the occasional modern stinker, and the
Tank Alliance is definitely holding it's own. You've got six pretty
good tanks, at least five of which are better than CW Brawl, all
sharing similar but distinct engineering, that combine into an
adorable, if not hugely posable, gestalt form. There is also s
seventh tank formed from leftover combiner bits, and it's a special
kind of lunacy. Let's break this down into segments.
Arm
Buddies: “TH-38” S35
Somua (desert drab) & “ST-39” M5A1 Stuart (olive drab)
The
most similar to a Combiner Wars deluxe, these two chaps set the tone
for the set. We got tank modes that edge into Advance Wars
territory visually, but are actually based on WW2 tanks, lighter ones
of the early war period. “ST-39” is based on the American Stuart,
the compressed portions dropping a set of bogey wheels, which led me
to initially think it was a Sherman. The S35 Somua led to go dumpster
diving in youtube comments to figure what it was, but it turns out
its a French cavalry tank, given how the war went for France, its
probably not surprising I didn’t recognise it. These tanks rely a
lot on plastic for their colouring for, with metallic paint picking
out details like the tracks. The sculpts are simple on first glance,
but there’s plenty going on. The turrets also turn, CW Brawl,
I’m looking at you, and the guns can pivot up and down. A
regrettable downside is that they lack rolling wheels, or weapon
storage, which would have made the tank modes basically ideal. Thier
robot modes are similarly dumpy and cute. These bring more grey into
in the mix via the revealed robot bits, which ends up being the
common visual element of the team. Posability is decent, if not
spectacular. All the major joints are covered, for 16 points of
articulation, so each can happily use their firearm. I’d say
“ST-39” was my favourite here, but its a very close race.
Leg
Buddies: “BP-35” Panzer V Panther (Desert Drab) & “SU-34”
T-34 (Olive Drab)
Evoking
the meatgrinder that was The Battle of Kursk, these two chaps form
the legs, while having a number of subtle but meaningful differences
from the arm chaps. They are the most similar to the aforementioned
Brawl in terms of overall appearance in robot mode. Admittedly, they
are still in the super-deformed style, if not as wide in the chest as
the above pair. Other visual changes include painted mouthplates, and
their turrets worn high. The leaner proportions help with posing, as
do the wrist swivels, but the forearms are undeniably messy. I
suppose you could flip over the bits as knuckledusters, if that does
it for you? Their tank modes meanwhile continue the positives, and
these two are undoubtedly the big name tanks of the set. Their part
in the combined form is however is kinda minimal; I wouldn't be
shocked if you told me these dudes weren't originally intended to
combine. Forming legs is mainly a matter of putting them into tank
mode and flipping a small strut out at each end. It works, but I have
doubts in the long term. Of the two, I’d probably pick “SU-34”,
but only because the other
had a non-essential tab break.
Body
Buddies: “GT-37” Panzer IV (Grey) & “WWT-36” Panzer 38t (Blue)
For
the final pair, we go back to the
early war for a Nazi doubleheader, although to be fair to the 38t,
that was originally Czechoslovakian.
Here
is where the CW Devastator comparison comes in, as we have two dudes
forming the torso, one having the unenviable job of being the pelvis
and thighs. The pair are heavily reliant on the combiner kibble and
tabbing to stay together, and so
the pair diverge significantly in their engineering from the above.
When it comes to “GT-37”,
the experience isn't that different, but
“WWT-36” is really taking
one for the team. It's the weakest individual toy in both modes, the
tank form being the most difficult to place and no real turret
rotation. Meanwhile, the robot form suffers
from having a weird and limited
neck. It does however have the most interesting transformation, the
scheme being reversed from the norm, so the robot chest is formed
from the rear of the tank. He's not actually terrible or anything,
but he would have benefited from another draft, maybe thick ratchet
joints. “GT-37”
fares better. He's somewhat more kibblely given both the additional
armour and combiner ports, but his functions as an individual are
less compromised. Both are pretty good though for what they are, it's
just the blue chap
feels like the one with the most difficult job, and he's kinda of a
C-.
Combiner
Tank
Before
we get to the main event, let's talk about the combiner bits. Now, in
the pursuit of a great big robot made from many smaller ones, a
problem that occurs is where to store the giant head and hands etc.
when not combined, while still having everything look good. Many
toys, especially those of 80's Transformers, opted to have these as
external parts you just put to one side, which is the original
meaning of the fandom term "kibble" I've used above. It's
not great as such things go. A lot of modern toys still do it that
way, including in the third party market, and the Tank Alliance does
do too. However two things run in its favour, in that the head wasn't
gonna store anywhere, and that they've done something
delightfully daft with the leftover bits. A ridiculous assembly of
all the combiner bits, this put me in mind of the old Micromaster
Combiners like Sixwing. It is however reliant on you putting all the
individual guns on it for full effect, which allows that one last gun
barrel to store. While this probably isn’t the reason you’d buy
the set, you have to respect the insanity on display.
Combined
Mode
I’m
not gonna mince my words. This poses better than you’d think, but
its main skill is just standing
there being adorable. Between
the engineering,
the weight, and the proportions, you can’t really do
dynamic with this guy. The best
you get is a kind of “angry puppy” vibe. My
criticisms here are the head and knee design. The head is lacking
both articulation and a good
connection, while the knees are kinda theoretical and
based on tabbing. Said
tabs are honestly robust in a manner befitting a tank, so
I’m probably worrying needlessly, but
I’d feel a lot happier if there was more mass to them. Your
expectations having been adjusted, Cuticus
is however doing two honestly good things beyond being
adorable. The first is
articulated hands, and the second is a gun to hold in them. Said
gun is formed from the individual weapons
of the
team, and its a very well-executed
little gimmick. It helps that
its all the same colour, and that there’s a dedicated tab for the
hands. The articulation
in this form certainly allows him/them to
that gun too, with 15 points in the major joints, and a further 6 in
each hand. You can make the toy just that little more expressive
which feels honestly a bit premium for the price. And there’s
the simple pleasure of having a big robot made from six tanks. I
don’t think I need to defend that.
My
point? Only that the Yuexing Animation Tank Alliance is something
that exists. I don’t know why
it exists. There’s a certain train of though that suggests it maybe
shouldn’t, but it does. Its like someone purposely
made this for me,
possibly through the misuse of a time machine.
Its got is weaknesses, but
its also got charms.