Retro Review: Gundam: Federation versus Zeon (PS2)

I have to keep reminding myself that the millennium was two decades ago. I think that's just part of getting older, or maybe just the a desire to escape 2020, but I find my nostalgia bracket creeping forward to that time. That time when anime was big, and expanding, but before certain distasteful trends became mainstream, and before I burnt out. FvZ dates from around that period, part of Bandai's big push to make Gundam a thing in the West. Huge back home, it however ended up as an obscure bargain-bin title in the UK, which I took advantage of. More recently, I reacquired the game, because of been in a Gundam phase lately, and TBH, it was quite influential on me. When it comes to the original Gundam story, it was actually a bit of nuisance to watch back then, as you have a choice between sub-only film versions that are quite long, or dub-only TV episodes you had to import. As a result the game was MUCH more approachable. Things are of course easier now that Bandai does that free YouTube channel, but you took what you could get back then. Incidentally, this isn't the first iteration of the game, either. This is actually the deluxe version with 0G space combat.

The thing about this game is that it's faithful to a fault, but it's based on something no bugger had heard of. So you start off with a serious sounding prologue mirroring the anime, and then run head-first into its cheesey 70's soundscape. The title screen announces itself with a loud "chu!", with this overly loud and baffling noise forming part of the menu interface. You navigate past this, into the game proper, and maybe start to enjoy the music, and then the English language track hits. There's a lot of repeated battle chatter, and your mileage may vary on how irritating it is. No, you can't switch to Japanese, for some level of separation. This is a downer.

 

So, once you've pushed past auditory issues, what's underneath? Well, a 3rd person shooter with a strong arcade feel. Which makes sense, as it was an arcade game originally. Rather than the strategic or simulation style that mecha games tend to be, FvZ has a deliberately simple interface and gameplay. You get one button to jump, one for shooting, one for melee, and one to lock the camera on target, with the shoulder buttons handling lesser used functions. This makes the game extremely easy to get into, and some effort has been made in ensuring mobile suits feel different. The animation and sound effects help, with something like the Dom gliding over the battlefield with a big gun, while a Guntank handles exactly like you'd expect. Something easily overlooked is the absence of hitscan weapons, with projectiles being visibly modelled and even destructible in some cases. This means you aren't sure of a hit even when locked on, it's a skill you have to learn. Game balance comes from a battle gauge bar for each faction, which acts as something like a points limit. You don't necessarily mind when something like a GM detonates, as it will be replaced from the bar without issue, but the loss of a Gelgoog is like loosing the game. Battles can get quite intense, although you do have rely on AI for your squad mates, and I can't decide if its functional, or if I'm just too busy to micro-manage it. I'm also less than keen on the zero gravity Missions. That said two player split screen is also availible, and given the general accessibility of FvZ, this certainly isn't a bad game to introduce a mate to.

It's not an especially deep game, mechanically, but there is progression and unlocks if you want to put in the time. More esoteric weapons like the G-Bull and Elmeth can eventually be used in multiplayer, but the campaign mode had greater appeal to me. Here you get a map screen and some initially repetitive scenarios as you encounter the famous battles of the One Year War. Here the strategy comes from selecting the Missions and trying to keep your mecha in good nick. A Gundam will happily slaughter all it sees, but it's not quickly repaired. There's no shortage of raw content there, and it does get engaging, although you might be disappointed to learn you can't change history as such.

Nerd complaints? Well, there's an unavoidable imbalance of variety between the forces. Zeon put out new designs every 10 minutes, and so has endless choice, but the Federation is much more limited. There has been an attempt to address this by adding in units from my personal fave, 08th MS Team, which is welcome, but there are issues later in the campaign as those can't be used in space. It would have been nice to see a few more GM variants, or at least a machine gun for the regular GM, so you had options. You'll also find the occasional oddity where a MS and its weapons don't sit well with control scheme.

Overall? FvZ is a functional if shallow game that does exactly what it set out to do. It doesn't have any real depth of mechanics or breadth of appeal, but it is fun and quite accessible. Enjoy in breif doses, ideally with another human.

Battlefleet Gothic: Brute versus Grunt

So, I had this idea to write a series of tactical analysis articles about a dead game I've hardly played, and am not likely to play for the foreseeable future. Why? Well, its something to do. I'm building some Ork Ships, so why not use the creative energy that's there?

Appearing in the original BFG rulebook, the Brute Ramship was possibly the one thing people actually liked about the Ork Pirate Fleet. Why? We'll get into that shortly, but one reason was that it was simply a unique ship that lent itself well to minmaxing. Over time, new ships where created and things improved, but the Brute remained popular. Advance to the 2010 compendium, these end up being the basis of another ship, the Grunt. Its just matter of plopping a Brute onto a battleship base, and you're done. But is the Grunt any good? Is the Brute also any good? Why might either be good or bad? For my ill-informed answer to these and similar questions, read on.

 

 

The Brute Ramship and the Art of the Head-on Collision

Now seems a good time to talk about ramming actions in general, before going onto the merits of the Brute. Ramming is usually a matter of three things, lining up, going on All Ahead Full, and then passing a leadership test to connect. Hull type and armour is important, as both ships inflict damage based on their maximum hull points, with the rammer taking the impact on the prow, and the ramee on the facing being dented. Another layer of complication comes from the size and orientation of the target, as its easier to hit a big ship with a small one, and “t-boning” results in the most reward for the least risk. Finally, ramming will always result in your ship moving its maximum distance, so its tricky to go from a ram into a boarding action on the the same target. Orks are pretty good at all this, due to THE BIG RED BUTTON, 6+ Prows, lots of hull points, and most weapons being front facing. An Ork ship can be confident of being in a position to attempt this, do it well, and then suddenly find in the middle of one of those fancy Imperial formations where it can have fun. Brutes are all about that. As escorts, these will almost never fail to hit their target, then inflict 4 dice worth of damage as their defining feature. These somehow ended up as the closest Ork thing to a regular escort too, having 90 degree turns and a reasonable pace of 25cm. Its most directly comparable to the Chaos Iconoclast class,while still having a 6+ front and all the other ork traits. Its the best of both worlds, and while its multidirectional gunz are weedy, it is very cheap at 25 points each. That said, a lot of people get rather excited by the Brute, not unreasonably, but let's not oversell it. As a weapon platform, its significantly outperformed by the admittedly inconsistent Onslaught. Sure, its relatively agile, but it's not got too much dakka. Also, by nature of its job description, it's got a life expectancy of about 20 minutes. It only takes one hit in a ram to destroy a Brute, and while you can chance that with a 6+ Prow, trying to headbutt a battleship is asking for a comedic end. 

 

The Grunt Assault Ship and the Art of “Inspiration”

Designed for boarding Actions with a secondary ram function, the Grunt is similar to the Brute, but dakka is proportionately less, and handling is much worse. The 45 degree turns and inability to Come To New Heading means it can't do the agile stuff. The larger base obviously makes it a bigger target for ordnance too, although it does have two turrets to compensate. As for its primary function? Boarding Actions are much easier overall to connect with than rams, as you only need to touch the target with that bigger base, but present a greater amount of risk. As escorts have only a single Hull Point, can be destroyed by a Critical Hit, with the latter maybe happening even if you win, you have to be prepared for these to die. Against other escorts, the odds are likely in your favour, but you probably need to gang up on something. This is less than ideal, as boarding results get applied to all ships, so whole squadrons can disappear if they pile-on and loose. Your bigger Kroozers don't have this concern, as while boarding is still chancy for them, they have a lot of Hull Points and other bonuses to make them good at it. Meanwhile, the Grunt has half the Ramming ability of the Brute, but the turning radius and larger base muddies the space waters. Grunts have a harder time aiming, but don't need to be as precise. However, these ships can buy the Klaws upgrade and become significantly more compelling. The possibility to inflict 2 damage before boarding commences largely compensates for the concerns above, and presents the amusing possibility of latching on. As Klaws damage on a 4+, they also offer a Lance substitute, and compensate for the reduced raw ramming damage. All things considered, with or without Klaws, a Grunt feels like an Orky answer to Tyranid escorts. That was probably the idea. However, this means that you have to be right on top of the enemy to do anything though, and the cost comes to 35 points each with grabbers.

Conclusion: Apples & Oranges

I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting the Grunt to have a such a clear distinction from the Brute, but neither being overtly superior to the other. It goes like this. The Brute is great at ramming, good as a conventional escort, and rather cheap. The Grunt is good/great at boarding, OK/good at ramming, but costs more and handles like a shopping cart. There is overlap, as both are based on high risk ploys that involve touching the enemy, but has its own unique selling point. That's a stark contrast to Ork Gunships, which tend to have only one function, as they have one defining weapon, and so are easily chosen. I feel actual playtesting is needed to decide a winner, but neither strikes me as a bad choice.

 

Gunpla: The MobileHaro (Haropla)

The Gundam franchise is for the most part a series of war dramas, but from day 1 it had elements of cute. Built by original protagonist Amuro Ray, Haro was essentially comic relief and kid appeal. It was an adorable pet, rather than a R2D2. Verbal, but not treated as having agency. Haro is of course ignored whenever people have "serious" discussions about Gundam, but Bandai rarely leaves a marketable concept alone for long, so Haro returned and multiplied. And became the Sunrise studio mascot. The most recent of these is the Haropla, a line of nonscale kits designed to be simple, attractive, and hugely collectable. Today's subject, for reasons which should be self-evident, is my first dalliance with the line.

As a build project, its a kit of two halves. The first is the globular Haro itself, which features a stand. This is simple to the point where actual tools may not be required, but the plastic and colours are almost perfect. Notably, the stand features storage for the optional limb parts, a nice touch. There's also a number of concealed ports for other bits, playing into a theme of customisation which I'll shortly becoming back to. If you ever wanted a Haro in plastic form, this is pretty good, bar some hollow bits. So, scaling for cost, I'm pleasantly surprised by the actual Haro.

Now for the actual reason I got this: the Mobile Suit bit. This is a large body for the Haro to sit in, which is similarly adorable, but in a super robot kinda way. It's got maybe a bit of the Boss Borat about it, with a big cylindrical body, stubby limbs, but an impressive rocket pack. Its great. And I'm pleased to report no real omissions with respects to articulation either, as it moves as well as something shaped like this could, with the arms being a highlight. Shame about the hollow bits again, notably in the feet. I had some difficulty getting the chest modules to go together. Still, not a bad way to spend a couple of hours.

 

The MobileHaro lacks accessories, it's hands being closed, but the instructions make reference to compatibility with other kits. This can be achieved via hand swaps, one example being with the GM/GM, which I had purchased at the same time by pure coincidence. Also the many small ports are compatible with Bandai option parts, such as from the 30 Minute Missions. You could properly tool this little dude up, although he poses well enough by himself. 

 

 

In sort: this was fun. Enough to make me consider doing more.

State of the blog post

OK, it's been roughly a year since I started doing gunpla as therapy, and blogging about it. I suppose some sort of retrospective is needed.

I'll admit that this blog is fundamentally a self-absorbed exercise. Many are, I suppose, but it's a realisation I only had recently. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy making things, and then writing about it, but I've begun to question why. Social media feedback was part of it, but I've found myself viewing it less of a treatment for stress so much as part of the issue. Even before I had to self-isolate, I found myself both a month ahead, more gunpla than I ever expected, and a return to ork-related projects like the Battlefleet Gothic stuff. And wondered whom/what it was for? Mainly for me, I think, I doubt I will ever be a "content creator" as such. Acknowledging that 2020 sucked balls, and any distraction was welcome, I suspect that there's an autistic component to this I wasn't fully conscious of previously. I'm starting wonder how much of my hobbies are things I actually enjoy for their own sake, or simply manifestations of the condition. Either that, or my tastes are merely fluctuating with the passage of time, and it wouldn't be the first time I ran headlong into a new hobby. I clearly have things to think about...

Anyways, while I intend to keep the blog going as a creative outlet, there's going to have to be variation and a clearing of a backlog. At time of writing, there's 11 weeks of articles pending, so I'll drop in several as bonus posts over the holiday period. Here's a brief list of what's in the pipeline.

Some more "remembering" of cartoons and anime.

A couple of video game mini-reviews.

Some articles on long-finished Gunpla.

More ork-adjacent BFG blogs.

Some Mecha Hack Stuff, as I backed the recent expansion on kickstarter.

Please check on Monday, for the first of the bonus articles.

Remembering She-Ra & The Princesses of Power (Netflix, Dreamworks)

OK, I'll be honest, I didn't think through what I'd have to do if She-ra actually won. This is gonna get personal, so bear with me.

 

 

Expressing all this is difficult. My initial reason for watching the Netflix She-ra was a mix of boredom and spite. Hey, don't judge me harshly. I'm an adult male whom collects toys and builds robot models, I don't claim to be especially mature. I'd just got Netflix for the first time, as I was on holiday. The show was on my radar as it seemed to be pissing off exactly the kind of person I dislike, so why not? I had no skin in the game, no attachment to the original, and not much to do. I was therefore gratified to find a well-written kids cartoon.

She-ra, when you get down to it, wasn't for me. I am not it's target audience any more than the haters were. I mean, look at those colours. It's a show for children, mainly girls, and as time went on, the LGBQT community. This is a separate matter from its objective quality, and ultimately why it attracted bile from some quarters. It is not pandering to 80's nostalgia, and it wasn't trying for adult geeks like say Steven Universe did. What the creatives did was retool the concept from the ground up, everything being a more interesting or smarter version of its source, until the merit became undeniable. But as She-ra found an audience far wider than anyone expected, it also got bolder with the LGBQT themes until it was shouting them. Cheering them. She-ra looks like a show about a girl empowered by destiny and a magic sword to fight off an alien invasion. But She-ra is actually a love story about two abused child soldiers finding themselves on opposite sides, doing the Mulder/Scully thing for 5 seasons, before literally saving the universe with a kiss. And they both happen to be women living on a world where such a relationship would be a total non-issue. And it is here where I regret my limitations as a writer. This was a show that did one of those "big first" moments, and thus will mean a lot to a lot of people. So much so, that I feel that there are better and more necessary voices than me whom should address these themes before myself. The show belongs to them and mine would be a well-meaning, earnest, but clumsy voice with little new to add. Let me just say that I'm very happy with how it turned out.

OK, I suppose I should go in a different direction, then, hadn't I? Something I do feel I can talk about adequately and with some degree of novelty. Oh. Crap. It has to be that, doesn't it?

Recently, around the time the series first streamed, I was diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder, and I didn't especially want to be. It was something of a bittersweet realisation, coming as it did in my late 30's, and I'd imagine it would be like discovering that you're adopted. It's not a bad thing, but a fundamental assumption of your life has changed. I find myself questioning and revisiting past interactions and habits. Its an entirely new strata of self-doubt if I'm honest, but maybe I know myself better now? Its questions like: oh, is that why I behaved like that? Is that part/some/most of the reason why I have difficulty connecting with people? Is that why I like this thing obsessively? Is that character Neurodivergent? Is this meant to be like me? There's certainly a lot of scifi I've watched with that question over it now. And then, this realisation: Ah yes, Entrapta. Oh. Well, there's also Rick & Morty, but I'll take the less toxic option, thanks. So , I'm gonna talk about Entrapta for a bit, before I curve back around and tell you that the show is good, once more.

Princess Entrapta is the primary technological expert of the series, whom ends up switching sides twice due to circumstance and not really having a moral compass in the conventional sense. Usually cheerful and eager to please, Entrapta is entirely about the science, building robots as friends, and fangirling about the fabled First Ones technology she comes across. Wider problems like there being a war on, and that she's maybe making weapons for the bad guys, do not register unless its really apocalyptic. For her, social norms and subtext is something that mainly happens to other people, although that's not to say she's indifferent to them. Entrapta's personality made her easily manipulated into working for The Evil Horde, but that meant she encountered the dictator Hordak, forming an unexpectedly adorable relationship. Lots of stuff to unpack with that, most of it involving said dictator, but lets keep it simple and say they both bonded as outsiders with techy interests. Following a betrayal, she ends up banished to the notably unpleasant and insanity-inducing Beast Island, and it barely slows her down. On rescue, Entrapta rejoins the Princess Alliance once a few misunderstandings are cleared up, but there are still consequences to be faced, ones she was largely oblivious to. But, as much as anyone other than the titular She-ra, Entrapta helps saves the day, firmly on the side of good when it really mattered. She also, at the last possible moment, ends up being what prompts Hordak to turn against the ultimate villain of the show.

 

I suppose Entrapta is one of those characters that is treated in-universe as being strange, but I'd not viewed it as meaning anything beyond just her being herself. I took her as a mad scientist archetype, eccentric certainly, but not someone I gave any thought to as being different with a capital D. Maybe that was because its a kids TV show at the end of the day and there's much more eye-catching stuff on display. Maybe my attention was on more important characters. Or maybe I just didn't recognise her as different from me, because she wasn't. I didn't realise this at first; Entrapta manifests many of the mannerisms and thought processes I didn't recognise as Autistic traits until very recently. Mainly the happier ones, as befits the show, but also the social awkwardness, naivety, and isolation. Things I personally still struggle with. And this is deliberate. Its not the only thing about the character, but it was the intent of a very inclusive creative team to have someone on the spectrum. And they did it just as I needed it, before I even knew that I needed it. Thank you. Thanks for having a nuanced autistic character on screen, and one whom seems to be at ease with herself.  And, of course, she went and said this:

 

Imperfection is what makes scientific experimentation possible. Imperfection is beautiful!... At least to me.

Expressing all this is difficult. I'm still learning what it means to be on the spectrum, and its not been an easy road. But I'll take what help I can get, and if that's a supporting character in a quality kids show, so be it. And that character is far from the only worthwhile thing in the cartoon. I'm gonna stop writing this one.  You go watch it.

Plamo: The 30 Minute Missions Alto (Ground Type, Olive Drab)

Its been far too long since I talked about one of these, and I'm currently having to self-isolate, so here's a bonus post!

The ground type represents a relatively straightforward variation on the Alto, although one that edges a bit close to Frame Arms territory should you opt for tank heelies. Seriously, see here. Most of the new parts are there to provide new lower legs plus feet, and a set of modular tank treads. As a project its as much fun as as any 30MM kit, but using these proved to be a touch less elegant than I would have liked, as it's hard to use all the components at once. The new feet can't ride the treads directly, you'd have to use the adaptors from the arm shields, which is an inconvenience. There's also a wee bit of a visual disconnect between the chonky-boy leg bits and the otherwise skinny frame, but nothing major. These kits are all about customisation, after-all, and one hopes for these gubbins to be separated out for a future re-release. Meanwhile, you get an absolutely gorgeous bazooka as armament, which overshadowed any nitpick I had. And if you are wondering, yes, you could build this as a stock Alto, although this kit omits the usual backpack and weapons. Here's a quick picture of the straight build.

What I ended up doing was simply replacing the feet with the treads, which meant removing the balljoints, but I think it works well. You could drill in new sockets for the polycaps, but that's the kind of delicate and precise work I'd want a spare set for. I decided to break up the olive drab a little with shoulder segments left over from an earlier project, and gave it a spare blaster as a secondary weapon. I found myself was working towards a Dom Tropen sorta vibe with this; its great to have a massive bazooka, but that's a liability up close.

This also ended up as something of an experiment in panel lines. I used a grey Gundammarker for the majority, which came out nice and subtle, if hard to photograph. The guns were done in a unipin fine line black, which helped the details pop. I think each played to the strengths of the plastic, and you'll see more like this in future blog posts.

 

 

While probably the least involved 30MM project I've done in a while, I'm rather proud of this one.

Plamo: Grot Tank (Warhammer 40K, World War Toons)

Baby tank, doo doo doo doo doo doo 

Baby tank, doo doo doo doo doo doo

Baby tank, doo doo doo doo doo doo 

Baby tank!

Sorry.

 

During the last moments of Orktober, I chanced upon an absolutely wonderful orky tank diorama, and eventually decided to have a go myself. This project was not completed until late November, and is still technically unfinished as I have yet to complete a crewman for the turret. I'm having a bad time with orky skin just now, and not liking the results from two different techniques. But as the majority is done, and that which is done is good, here we are.

The main kit is a Meng KV-2, as part of their "World War Toons" line. Meng isa fairly serious name in scale modelling, but this appears to be merchandise from a cutesygame. This means the tank has exaggerated proportions, but the kit didn't feel dumbed down. The only complaint I'd make are the rubber tracks, but that's a common weakness of tank kits. I'll probably come back to the merits of these in a future article, but these seem rather good for a tenner. As the KV-2 is quite excessive even when depicted normally, this project immediately morphed into an Orkish enterprise once I had it in hand, as opposed to a straight build like I originally wanted. More specifically, a Grot Tank, a vehicle built by the perpetual butt monkeys of Warhammer 40k, Gretchin. A.K.A space goblins. Its not game legal, as far as I know, but I haven't bothered to check.

The tank was assembled largely as per instructions, and then dressed with any bits that fit. I also applied a packet of stick-on gems to imitate rivets, an effect that worked here, but on reflection needed more glue in places. As I had doubts about the tracks, I mounted it on a base made from a stack of old cds. Jobs a Good 'Un.

Plamo: Ork Lite Kroozer (Battlefleet Gothic)

 So, following on from that attempted tactics article, here's the end result, the Lite Kroozer Thermidor. 

 

 

This was painted and constructed in the same manner as the Orktober Terror Ship, although things went better. The main body is another cheapo starship, a skinnier one as befits its stats. As its meant to be an incomplete ship, its asymmetrical, and only has five engines. One of these is from a metal Kill Kroozer, and yes I know that's sacrilege, but it helps with balance. The base mount is not at the centre, and those new Klaws shift its centre of gravity even further forwards, so a chunky metal bit solves that problem. 

 

 

 

Said Klaws should be immediately recognisable to Ork players, but the joints shouldn't be. These are taken from a Neko Busou kit, lit. “Cat Weapon”, which is incidentally where the cats I use in photography come from. Google that sometime, its a blast. The Klaws are secured in pose, but not permanently attached for ease of transport, and possibly alternate weaponry if its needed.

While I don't have too much interesting to say here, I'm very pleased with how this turned out. It makes me feel more confident about converting bigger ships. As to why I've named this Thermidor? Well, its a blue lobster with a pirate's demeanour.

 

 

Gunpla: The V08Re-0526 Helmwige Reincar (IBO HG)

When I do a write-up for one of these, I like to check the lore for some context, and to help with the introductory paragraph. Here's what I found out: the Helmwige Reincar is a centuries old, but recently refitted, Mobile Suit based off the Grimgerde. Its named for German opera and Nordic mythology. Its service record is somewhat obscure, the design lineage being overshadowed by the assorted Gundams, and seemingly produced in very limited numbers. Its on screen performance from what I've read isn't that impressive either, and can be summarised as: "holds a sword, pilot killed in a notably violent manner while defending another". None of that really matters however, as it has an obscenely large sword. A sword in fact, so stupidly large, that its longer than the robot is tall, and makes photography a nuisance.

 

Yes, I know it's childish to fixate on that, especially as really big swords are a common anime thing. But the thing stores on a pop-out codpiece mount, I think I am only responding in kind. And, the thing is, it's rather impractical. I don't mean the obvious way, I mean in the "how can I balance this, the joints can't take it" way. The Astaroth I did a while back had a similar problem, in that the internal frame gimmick and disproportionate weapons don't mix due to polycaps, but at least they tried to compensate here. The oversized hands and handles have a tabbing system, and there's optional/mandatory wider feet to help. Then again, none of this is especially unexpected. Iron Blooded Orphans kits tend to have their waist joints based around an unrestricted balljoint, and you've got a problem once the friction is lost. That will probably ruin this guy, as the right elbow is already suffering, and the Astaroth isn't ageing well on the shelf.

 

OK, so about 270 words in, and I've only talked about the sword, the phallic imagery it presents, and how it demonstrates that there is such a thing as too much sword. What else can I say? There is a mace? Part of the sword detaches for what I presume is a back up weapon. For wildly impractical dual welding.

Sorry. Seriously now. The embodies what I consider to be both the virtues and sins of the Iron Blooded Orphans line. You build each body part bones first, before applying armour atop. Toro here has a lot of armour, but it's designed so as not to interfere with mobility. That's both a positive and a negative, due to the aforementioned joint issues. This being the third time I've built one like this, the process offered few surprises but no annoyance. There is a sticker sheet, which is extremely minimal by IBO standards, covering, although I've handled better stickers. Purists may also not that this kit deviates from the show I'd that it was a monoeye, rather than a visor, but no biggie. Visually its pretty good, and I like the Minotaur motif it has going on. This does look like a machine that would charge right at you, especially with the face mask up, and the horns down. It's orky, and I like that.

When you get right down it, the Helmwige Reincar is very typical of the IBO design philosophy, and my taste for the absurd. And the colour blue. But it's inevitable balance issues prevent me from giving it a glowing endorsement, even though I found it a nicely relaxing project.

Battlefleet Gothic: Da Lite Krooser Konumdrem

So, I had this idea to write a series of tactical analysis articles about a dead game I've hardly played, and am not likely to play for the foreseeable future. Why? Well, its something to do. I'm building some Ork Ships, so why not use the creative energy that's there?

This article started with a question.
 

Why is the Lite Kroozer? Seriously, why?

Appearing in the 2010 Compendium, the Lite Kroozer is part of the expanded Ork Clans list. As the name implies, its a smaller class of Kroozer, presumably to fill a gap between the full sized versions and Escorts. And, though it pains me to say: its a bit crap on first impression. This is mainly due to their underwhelming selection of weapons, equivalent to a single Gunship upfront, and half of one on a broadside. While tougher than an equivalent weight of escorts,its going to have less dakka, it doesn't look to work well in a squadron either. Furthermore, it doesn't bring anything new or distinctive to the table. Yes, it's cheap and durable at 90 points, but what's it for? Why would I take this over a full Kroozer, or an Escort Squadron? Then there's this extract, which suggests a vaguely confused concept.

By their very nature, Ork Lite Kroozers come in a wide array of forms. They may represent a captured or salvaged Imperial light cruiser hull instead of the larger Imperial or Chaos cruisers Orks more typically build their Kill Kroozers and Terror Ships from. Conversely, they may have originated from an enterprising Ork Kaptain that cut apart and bolted together several escorts he captured, salvaged or even re-appropriated from his own skwadron!

 

So is this a salvaged light cruiser , 60% of a Kill Krooser, or 3 Gunships welded together?

It's kinda all three at once. There's some similarities to the Endeavour family of ships. There's a lot of overlap with Gunships, as you get what amounts to having one of the big 3 as the main prow armament. However, the greatest similarity is to the Kill Kroozer, as the Lite has largely identical mobility and defensive qualities, just with 4 less Hull Points. In practical terms, this boils down to a single Gunship lengthened, sprinkled with some Gunz, and made a more desirable target for bomber tokens.

Crowdsourced Answers

As I'm not really in a position to actually playtest just now, I posed my concerns to a BFG facebook group, and got a largely helpful selection of responses. Putting aside negative viewpoints, these fell into two broad arguments. The first was to view the Lite Kroozer as a low cost slot filler. 90 points is definitely on the cheap side, and this leads to some rather mundane applications in smaller games and fleet building. The second was to view the Lite Kroozer as a Ramming and Boarding platform, in the same way as their larger kin. I've not got around to writing much about these abilities yet, but the short version: Ork faction bonuses and ship design reward both. Lesser represented opinions included the Lite Kroozer being a distraction, a support to escorts, and a bully of escorts.

My take

Both of the main arguments above have merit, although neither leap out as compelling or unique. With respects to the seat filling aspects first :the Clan list enforces a roughly 50% Escort requirement, based on the presence of Warlords and their rerolls. As such, sliding one or two Lite Kroozers into your list may be necessary, although your mileage may vary. I drew up some provisional lists based on what I have painted, and found a few places where this could help me support my swarms of Ramships, as opposed to the Terror Ship. It's very easy to get blocks of a single Lite and escorts of about 210 points. That's not exciting, and you can always put a Warlord on a Brute or something, but that's a use. The whole Boarding/Ramming argument does also hold water, but mainly due to stuff like the (kinda awesome) Klaw Gubbins and the Warlord bonus. A mere six hull points does not equate to a high Boarding Value by itself, and those same upgrades could probably be better applied to something bigger. Meanwhile Ramming ability does not degrade in the same way as boarding value, although the comparison with Ramships and larger Kroozers is mixed. Brutes are basically perfect at the job, and a Kill Kroozer rams harder, but a Lite is more survivable than the former, and more disposable than the latter.

While I'm not expecting such a ship to be great, or even OK, I'd be lying if I said the idea of a 100 point ship with grabbing arms didn't appeal. It reminds me of summat else.....

 

Wrapping Things Up

Well, I got an answer, and short of playtesting, I'll take it. Plus, I'm building one.

 

Reader Poll!

 Hi there!

I've been doing this regularly for a year now, and want to do something special for Xmas. Please head over to twitter to help me choose.

Cheers.

Gunpla: The RMS-117 Galbaldy β (HGUC)

As you are likely to have noticed, Bandai is fond of merchandising its Gundam Franchise on a scale worthy of Star Wars. Big names come first, and there is a tendency to skip villains, but everything gets done sooner or later. The Galbaldy Beta is an example of this. Its part of the highly regarded series Zeta Gundam, and appeared in a fairly important early scene. However, its screen time otherwise was short, and Zeta had a glut of designs, and it seems to have gotten lost in the shuffle. This 2018 kit is probably the most attention it's ever gotten. 

 

 

As a project, I was initially bemused by its large number of sprues. The Galbaldy is not an especially big or complex suit, its basically a Zeon-looking chap with a sword/gun/saber combo, so this puzzled me. The excessive sprue count seems to have been in aid of a double-dip on the mould, namely the Build Divers Galbaldy Rebake. This is actually great for colour separation, but he kit feels more complex than it needs to be. The ab joint is good example, as it adds maybe 5 degrees of movement before popping out, which is a real shame as there's a second balljoint in there for this purpose. Similarly, you do get opening beam saber storage in the shoulders, but its purely decorative, with the actual weapons being too long to fit. There's also a removable chest panel for the cockpit, but there's nowt underneath. Finally, you only get 3 stickers for this, 2 being perfectly acceptable, but then there's the monoeye. If it had just gone on a flat piece, it would have been fine, but some bright spark moulded the monoeye in too, so it doesn't sit right. Basically, they could have gone simpler for any/all of those areas and ended up with a better kit. Or tried harder and maybe increase the price by 15%.

None of this to suggest its bad kit, mind you. The Galbaldy Beta has that "good grunt" vibe, and went together with no issue at all. Take care with the ab joint, and you've got a perfectly posable dude. Its got a nice gun, a couple of beam sabres, and a collapsing shield. Aside from the somewhat Char colours, its the platonic idea of a grunt, or possibly an elite mook. The story behind the design is interesting too, essentially being a link between the Gelgoog, Gyan and Rick Dias, which makes sense when you look at the details.

 

 

If I'm honest, this was ever so slightly unsatisfying to me as a project. Its not that its bad, far from it. Its that its good, but could so easily have been great. And there's not much finishing it needs, other than fixing the monoeye, which looks more trouble than its worth. I think I'd rather have a kit with obvious but understandable flaws, rather than one that was 90% good, and 10% questionable design choice. Its like a film that's good apart from one or two scenes that could have so easily have been cut. Maybe the Rebake is more up my alley?

Battlefleet Gothic: Ork Tactics, Sort-of

So, I had this idea to write a series of tactical analysis articles about a dead game I've hardly played, and am not likely to play for the foreseeable future. Why? Well, its something to do. I'm building some Ork Ships, so why not use the creative energy that's there? Plus its ORKTOBER! Well, it was yesterday.

 

The Ork Fleet Concept

Orks start from a position of being the comic relief faction explicitly and repeated stated as being bad at this whole space navy stuff. Its easy to think the rules for them back this up, because there's pretty some obvious flaws. They also suffer from comparisons with the Panzee list, which had a similar but opposite approach to its ships. But this is not the whole story.

Now, I ended up drafting and redrafting this article repeatedly, creating pages of notes as I read around, researched, and mathammered at this game. I was trying to understand how the Ork Fleet was meant to work, and as an Ork player I'll admit to a vested interest in proving the common perception of the fleet wrong. I.e. I'd be able to live with the ships being held together with duct-tape, nails, and prayer if there was an Orky way to play. Its not like I have the inclination to play often, anyway, but given time and money investments, I like to know what I'm dealing with. Its core concept in other words. The humie fleet is flexible, but mainly about forming nice lines and torpedoing things to death. Those Chaos boyz like to keep their distance, and/or go for a selection pack of god-based bonuses. The Panzees, are, well, Panzees. The obvious answer was to say that the Ork Fleet is about frontal assaults, and then spend a bit of time listing the ways their weaknesses and strengths select for that. Or I could have talked about how Orks started as a smaller list mainly intended for Raid missions, which is where certain ships shine brighter. Or I could talk about how Ork Kroozers resembled knock-off Imperial cruisers, while their escorts are more immediately appealing. But no. 

The metaphor that makes the most sense to me, and the most interesting to write about, is tell to you how the original Ork ships, i.e. the ones in the rulebook, resemble Ork infantry and models from Warhammer 40K. Buckle up.

Brute Ramships = Choppa Boyz

Every faction needs its one bread & butter choice, and this is the Brute. It is highly regarded for its notably low cost, solid all round stats, and its talent for head-on collisions. Can be spammed, but also is the most agile Ork ship by some margin. Of course, you can build a fleet without Brutes, in much the same way you could build an army without Choppa Boyz. You'd just need a proper reason not to.

Onslaught Attack Ships = Shoota Boyz

Orks don't do long range combat well, an issue and a half in space, but do a ship that does no-nonsense dakka in the Onslaught. It offers enthusiasm rather than consistency, a big trend in Ork naval design, but dakka is dakka. Here we also note the general format of the Ork vessels; lotta guns and armour upfront, fast in a straight line, but with bad handling and no ability to broadside. Its a ATTACK SHIP, a SHIP that ATTACKS. Not a frigate or destroyer.

Savage Gunships = Burnaboyz

Like Burnaboyz, Savages are great, but in only quite specific and fiddly circumstances. Technically a threat to most targets and nippier than most of its kin, the minimal range makes them unpopular outside of scenarios where you deploy close to the enemy. Also oddly notable for having consistent damage output, but don't treat them like Lance boats, they don't work like that.

Ravager Gunships = Rokkit Launcha Boyz

Probably the most random and least reliable of the Ork escorts, Ravagers are also the one with the most specific niche: coating the board with rokkits that your foe should dodge. If you roll well, these things can output more torpedoes than any other ship of its size, buuuut ork discipline and/or enemy revenge will make reloading tricky. Also somewhat multi-functional due to its back-up guns and turrets. These will often end up in mixed squadrons as "that one dude with the rokkits" or alternatively in dedicated squadrons. Either way, consider yourself lucky if you get to fire twice.

Kill Kroozer = Battlewagon

These have guns, but are more about running people over, (AKA Ramming,) or having the Orks riding therein jump out and punch things (AKA Boarding Actions). Cheap & customizable to an extent, especially if a Warlord is on-board, which is rather like having a Nobz mob as boozed-up passengers. These are tough, obvious targets to distract from your Gunships, but not as tough as you may think, and need to be mindful of bombers. Can actually do broadsides, but only really within 15cms.

Terror Ship = a different Battlewagon

99% similar to the unit above, but with one gimmick that encourages you to keep your distance. Actually about as mandatory as the Ramships, as it provides a vital answer to enemy bombers. However, once bigger ships are available Terror Ships loose a bit of appeal.

How is the Ork fleet unlike their 40k Army?

Well, the fleet is one that must aggressively close with the enemy, firing the whole time, and ideally create a mess of confusion in their lines where Orks can break heads like Gork and Mork intended. Oh wait. No. That sounds exactly like the 40k army. But that's sorta the point. Battlefleet Gothic is played on large tables with often minimal scenery, where movement is mandatory. Fire arcs are also a huge thing, as Ork guns usually fire forwards, where their armour is thickest, but not necessarily on the sides, where the armour is weak. This combined with the modest effective range of their ships mean that Orks often have to hurry to meet the enemy, whereas the most recent Ork Codex allows for greater freedom in how you kill things. Part of that's simply the march of time, and there's later additions I haven't talked about above, but you're gonna have to deal with a short range, a limited pool of ships to choose from, and taking a lot of damage on the way in. You'll also find a lack of modern amenities like a clan system, unless you use the 2010 compendium rules. These documents are unusual in that they are fan-made, but GW approved, and tournament legal. While I'm in favour of the compendium on balance grounds, I remain personally undecided if I actually like those ork rules as these add a lot of complications. And obviously don't line up with how the clans are done these days. On the plus side? The Clan list has more Lances, and some newer ships. In practical terms, you have three lists to choose from, the original Pirate list, the expanded Waaagh list, and the 2010 Clan list. These get progressively more powerful and “complete” as you go along, but I stand by the metaphor I use above.

Wrapping things up

I don't have the arrogance to call this a tactics article, this is all theory, but I hope it was of some use or entertainment to you. Sequel articles may appear as and when I have something funny or interesting to say.

Plamo: The Orktober Terror Ship (Battlefleet Gothic)

 

Well, its the last Sunday of Orktober, so here's the finished model I started a few weeks back. I've not got a huge amount to say here, as the previous articles largely covered the creative process. Such as it was. I free-form stuff like this, a process both helped and hindered by a lack of materials and forgetfulness.

On the plus side: I feel that I can move onto more involved projects, as it does a good job of capturing a fundamental Orkyness, while obviously being a carrier ship of some kind. I have been told it resembles a ship from Star Fleet, which wasn't intended, but is flattering. On the minus side: I goofed with the Nuln Oil wash and ended up making this MUCH darker than I wanted. Things eventually got to the point where I decided to stop messing with it, for fear of compounding a mistake, which I have done before. That brings the painted fleet registry to 3 Kroozers, 25 Ramships, and 6 Onslaughts. It seems I'd forgotten that I had a functional fleet ready to go...

Future projects? Well, I have that incomplete Kroozer, and a 60% done Hammer class. Those are probably doable now that I've had a bits delivery, but I'm not feeling it. I may end up scrapping them both for parts, as I'm rolling in ship hulls and plastic gubbinz just now. Alternatively, I do have a “Gorbag's Revenge”. The more immediate project is however gonna be, probably, a trio of Onslaughts from the bag of cheapo ships...

 

 

Or another Gunpla.

Book Mini-Review: Brutal Kunnin by Mike Brooks

Like most multimedia empires, Games Workshop maintains its own publishing arm for tie-in books. There's hundreds of the damn things, of variable quality and bleakness. The problem in doing this is, I feel, is that Warhammer 40,000 and other GW settings are so relentlessly grim it presents a narrative barrier. Books written in universe, say as a military history, work out great, others I can take or leave. The main exception to this are the Commissar Cain novels, a slightly repetitive series of War memoirs that seeks to ask "what if 40K was also Blackadder the 4th?“. Brutal Kunnin happily joins it as a second exception.

 

Brutal Kunnin makes the rare choice of telling a story from the Ork perspective, something well-loved in rulebooks and short stories, but to the best of my knowledge not attempted in novel format before. It sees our protagonist Ufthak Blackhawk, a recently "elevated" Nob as his Waagh attacks a Forge World. Author Mike Brooks immediately and consistently nails the Ork approach to life as Ufthak faces the GRIMDARK with utter indifference, dumb luck, brute force, and sheer audacity. If Ufthak is on the page, you've usually got something laugh out loud funny, and always Orky. The novel never treats the Orks as simply comedic characters either; they don't know what they are doing is funny, so they don't act like they do. What they find funny is stuff like severed limbs sent flying from an exploding grenade, which the the writing does not gloss over. However, at this point, I must mention the main similarity to the aforementioned Cain series: the presence of alternate viewpoints written in a different style.

 

Narrative tasks like "exposition", "plot development", and "thinking for 5 minutes" are handled by a variety of non-Orks, mainly of the Adeptus Mechanicus. While these changing viewpoints were not advertised, quite the opposite, this makes a certain degree of sense. Orks are about as introspective as a stag-do, and stuffy/allegedly-logical Techpriests are good foils for them. I also liked the unexpectedly diverse selection of pronouns on display, Orks being the personifiication of toxic masculinity, although maybe I'm just showing my age on that front. At the very least, I didn't feel that the fundamental Orkyness of events was being upstaged by a bunch of umies, and those umies are quite well rounded given thier page count. The author also uses this as an excuse to have fun with chapter titles.

 

All in all: Brutal Kunnin is not a deep book, but it never would have been. Its just a good laugh.

Plamo: More Ork Terror Ships in progress (Battlefleet Gothic)

Well, here's that follow-up article I promised. Yes, and this time its with two more Terror ships, because what are diminishing returns?

 

 

Let's start with the most involved of the two. TBH, this little project was about reminding myself how to scratchbuild, and to assess what of my bits box remains useful. Its core component is an actual spaceship this time, one I acquired in a mixed bag of 35 for a tenner, so my expectations weren't high. The contents however proved to be pretty decent, and they accepted a stand without modification. Choosing what I think was a “lander”, see photos, I cut off the back half, and stripped the front engines, and set about bulking things out. It seems I may have cleared out some raw materials since I last did this, so the build was definitely more improvisational than I intended, hence the use of drinking straws and two types of off-brand lego. At the time of writing, I'm still awaiting new materials, but if you compare the unmodified toy to what it now resembles, I think its going OK. Its got ten engines and a face, which seems to be my signature style now.

 

 

Yes, yes. I know it has shiny gems on it. It will be fine with a brown undercoat. Its not done!

As I like to paint things in bulk, I decided to look into another Orky Capital Ship I had knocking about. This second Terror Ship started as an incomplete Kill Krooser I got in a mixed lot, which I started on back in the day and never finished. This demonstrates my distaste for the Kill Krooser at the time, and also how far I have to go before I can scratchbuild something in the same style. I added in launch tubes and more recently new engines in an attempt to balance the thing. I'm rather unhappy with it so far, I really need those new materials, and the damn thing doesn't like stands. Putting a big metal model on a thin plastic flight base, who would have thought that could be a problem?

 

All-in-all, I'm edging towards a functional fleet, as Orks max out at only six standard capital ships, and I've already got assorted Rams and Onslaughts. That leaves the more specialised escorts, and big projects like the Space Hulk. I'll move up to something more involved once these are done, I think.

Plamo: Scratchbuilt Ork Terror Ships (Battlefleet Gothic)

 

Way back in the before times of 2016/2017, I was blogging about model-making. The more things change, the more they stay the same. One project that stalled before completion was my attempt to build an Ork fleet for the long-dead spaceship game Battlefleet Gothic. I think it was the playing of Warhammer 40K proper that did that one in. However, I did not share on here anything of the 2^nd completed Terror Ship, and I'm slightly better with a camera these days, so here we go.

 

Its been a while, so maybe I'm misremembering, but my basic approach here was not to mimic the official models and just make it obviously Orky. I.e. ramshackle and loads of engines, while evoking Ork walkers like the Stompa. Part of that was simply a lack of skill, but also an influence from Gurren Lagann and its big faces motif. These are built a core of knock-off lego and misc plastic, and then dressed with bits, some naval in origin.

So,why am I bringing this up again? Well, I thought I'd tempt fate and try again. I've been in a BFG mood of late, and got lucky with some cheap ships as conversion fodder.

 

Either I'll have something new to show in coming weeks, or I'll never mention it again.